June 11, 2010 7:16 pm 0 comments ,

For those in the camp that this movie is a terrible knockoff of Gremlins, you are completely wrong. It is in fact a terrible rip-off of the much worse Ghoulies franchise.

In honor of the World Cup, which started today, and the impending England vs. USA match tomorrow I feel the urge to finish this review by using as many British slang words I can. And so my American readers can tell what is going on I will translate according to some dictionary I found online.

Munchies should be detained by Her Majesty’s pleasure (locked up forever) for being complete and utter bollocks (testicles). As opposed to a serious horror film the producers attempted to go the comedy route, which is fine if the jokes work. Unfortunately, almost all the jokes must have been written by a plonker (idiot). This truly is a grotty (unpleasant) little film.

The plot, if you can call it that, revolves around a bloke (guy) who discovers a creature in Peru and decides to take the thing back to his yank (American) city. Upon arrival, a whole bunch of rubbish (trash) occurs which is neither amusing nor funny. It is simply crap.

In one bloody (emphasis) stupid scene, the creatures (they multiply rapidly) steal a Gremlin. A 1970’s AMC Gremlin. Then they smoke some pot, learn English, procure a shotgun, chase down an old codger while driving the Gremlin, and shoot at her. The woman actor is as believable as Heidi Montag’s chest or any article written by The Sun. There is also some creature masturbation at one point. It is that bad.

The dialogue is duff (trash). The actors are wankers and nancies (dicks and pussies). The direction is cocked-up (a complete mess).

Bascially, the whole film is manky (gross) knobcheese (something like penis cheese).

Cheerio mates,


Snore Factor: ZZZZZ

IMDB 1987

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